.: welcome to tards development

Here at Tards Incorporated, we believe in the highest quality of retarded software. Our developers are not mentally challenged, but our products may lead you to believe so.

.: our motto

"The future ain't what it used to be." - Yogi Berra

.: about us

Our staff includes some of the finest developers in the history of the universe. Period.

Staff Officers:

  • ACTION_Gandhi - Master Webtard, Bug-dog
  • SQLDIER - Chief Developtard
  • Mailman128 - Jr. Developtard

.: projects


  • Visit Death Zeppelin for more games

  • Moo Cow vs. Chickety DooDAH: The Farm Chronicles Description:
    Actual In-Game Screenshot A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, no, in a field, just a stone's throw awry, they're grazed a cow in peaceful serenity, MooCow was his name, MooCowz arc enemy was the fiendish poultry warrior, Chi8cketyDooDah, son of ChicketyDooDan, now chicketydoodan was a drifty (you see), who want around playntin aplple seeds,

    Download (4.22 MB)

    ManBoyChildGuy Description:
    Actual In-Game Screenshot In this final game of an epic trilogy, you must guide ManBoyChildGuy successfully through his struggle between good and evil. This classic coming-of-age tale has swept the nation, surpassing 20,000 downloads (I just farted). ManBoyChildGuy must use his wits and brute strength to conquer all five sprawling stages. Featuring next-gen visuals and stunning audio effects, this game will straight-up blow your pants off.

    Download (5.73 MB)

    ManBoyChildGuy 2: Post Jesus Description:
    Actual In-Game Screenshot The sequel to the award-winning, "blow your pants off" ManBoyChildGuy, ManBoyChildGuy 2: Post Jesus takes place after a thrilling finale. With his newfound divinity, ManBoyChildGuy must infiltrate Evil's headquarters to retrieve the famed Jade Monkey. The choice is up to you.

    Download (11.1 MB)

    ManBoyChildGuy III: Vengeance Description:
    Actual In-Game Screenshot After surviving the hellish landscape of Hell and the tricky barbedwire of the command post, you're now a man, a manny man, and find yourself equipped with your newfound manhood in the 3rd dimension with an epic 3D adventure, costarring Julia Roberts. Be prepared to have your pants blown off.

    Download (86 MB)


    GPACheck Description:
    Actual In-App Screenshot This award-winning, extremely functional software will change your life. Not only will it allow you to check your GPA, but it will also alleviate world hunger, nurture babies, and blow your frickin' pants off (if you're not careful).

    Note: This program requires Java.

    Download (168 KB)

    Minimum system requirements:

    • Anything but Mac
    • 2 GHz Pentium 5/AMD Xemuron (or equivalent)
    • 1 GB RAM
    • 30 GB free hard disk space
    • 512 MB DirectX 11 compatible video card
    • 7.3 surround sound compatible audio card
    • No viruses (free antivirus software in development)


    USA vs. Ghana with ideal commentary Balls It's Axminster

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